In My Feels...

Two weeks ago I met a 19 year old girl that lost both of her parents at a young age. She was in an abusive relationship shortly after, but felt trapped because her boyfriend’s parents adopted her. She started using drugs to numb the pain which triggered her epilepsy and had a high level seizure one night after taking Xanax. It was a wake up call large enough to give her the courage  to leave her addict boyfriend and get her life back together. She still battles with having the urge to do drugs everyday,  but is now slowly finding her way to self love and victory.We sat in a kitchen together at a small get together and discussed all of the life events that attempted to bring her down. We sat there for hours smoking and making sense out of the challenges life can bring you. I fell asleep on the couch after one too many spliffs, and never got a chance to say goodbye. Timing is everything and I’ll always love God for being so great at this because I ran into her last night at a pa...

We were black settlers trying to find a place to call home... Langston had a dream he wanted us to have a state to call our own... White America also had a dream, they had a different vision north and south were the division We took it and built with the little territory we were given... Black entrepreneurs we started our own district Bankers, Doctors, and Teachers They didn't even believe we were smart enough to become readers... The Greenwood District we were alive, wealthy and thriving! The white man feared to see us do more than just surviving! If it wasn't Dick Rowland they would have found another reason... Red summers, and lynching season By any means they were ready to call it treason! Planes in the sky dropping bombs to kill us all They torched everything to see our city fall 16 hours was all it took to burn our black city to the ground.. They couldn't bare to see us try to snatch back our precious crowns...

I know it seems like life is never fair I know you been hurt a lot and never spared You build walls and barricades To make sure nobody can steal your heart again and run away It’s ok to be afraid Keep working hard for better days You’re AMAZING stay RESILIENT You are GODLY you are BRILLIANT Don’t let your shine fade away Break down those walls and pave the way Heal your heart and break chains You weren’t made to stay the same

Nights like this she walked straight past him with disappointment written all over her face, closing their bedroom door behind her. She came over to her bed of peace and thought of how many times she asked him to do that one thing for her today, and yet he found everything else to put in front of her. He continued on with his night, sat down and relaxed in the living room not even noticing he let her down. She laid there, and wondered how many let downs will it take for her to accept he doesn’t notice her anymore. How many eye rolls, silent treatments, and “thanks for not being a man of your word” conversations will it take for him to notice, he has not invested an equal effort into this relationship. He no longer had the desire to put in the time to see her smile. Countless times, and frowns, pushed her to walk to the edge and finally jump. She cheated and prepared to leave him because that other guy noticed her when her man at home made her invisible. Now her man at home is questio...